


Is it though?

by Third__Writer



Series: Insecurities [1]
Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:27:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27587438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Third__Writer/pseuds/Third__Writer
Summary: Peeta wakes up to an empty bed after their first time.
Relationships: Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark
Series: Insecurities [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016623
Comments: 12
Kudos: 40





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve started a new series called Insecurities, because who doesn’t have them? I’m also taking requests for this particular topic.

She isn’t there when he wakes up.

  
  


Normally this wouldn’t bother him. Before, when they were dancing around their feelings and carefully keeping boundaries, she asks him to come to bed, he doesn’t refuse, and the morning after her side is empty and cold.

But this wasn’t like before.

They had finally admitted their love for each other—well, Peeta had before, he was just waiting for her to say it back—and he just expected things to be different.  
  


But was it real?   
  


It can’t be. He has dreams like this sometimes, when he peels her clothes off agonizingly slow, places tender kisses against her neck and nibbling her earlobe, waking up to find her gone and nothing to show that it was real.

But the sheets are on the floor and there’s a spot of blood on the fitted sheet, so that has to have been.

_Keep telling yourself that,_ he thinks.

After about a half hour of trying to understand the situation between them, he gives up and starts his day. The people that came back to District 12 are hungry.


	2. Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katniss side of the story, since you guys requested it.

She didn’t know what to think. Waking up to his arms wrapped around her torso terrified her, even more so that they were both...

Naked.

She cringes as she sits on the log. The same same place where Gale told her he loved her. The same log that held many memories of her father.

It seems wrong to think about last night sitting here, as if it were tainting the memories.

But she can’t help it as ghostly hands run down her body, coming to stop at her—

She stands up and checks the snares again.

...

She can’t read him now. It’s been two days since it happened, and he’s baking pastries for her in her own kitchen like nothing ever changed.

She wants to tell him, ask him if anything’s different, if he expects her to say the three words she sort of said last night.

  
So she tries. “Peeta?”

He stops kneading and looks up at her.

”I lo—I love—I—“ she can’t bring herself to do so.

“It’s okay, Katniss, you don’t have to.” He says with a small smile, and she knows it doesn’t reach his eyes.

_Why does he make things so difficult?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might make a part three, just to finish it.


	3. Part Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Posting again for this work, since you guys wanted to know what happens next.

She doesn’t know why today she wanted to try again.

  
It might have been that today was the third anniversary of the last reaping day.

It might have been the newscasts of celebrations, hailing her a hero, the Mockingjay.

It might have been the fireworks exploding in the sky, reminding her too much of the bombs that separated her from her sister forever.

It might have even been the fact that she saw Gale stepping off the train in District 12.

  
  


What ever was the case, she wanted to forget, so when it seemed appropriate, Katniss shifted in his arms to kiss him again.

He doesn’t protest (but when did he ever) and pulls her closer.

He stops when she places his hand near her chest. She tries to suckle his earlobe, nibble his bottom lip, anything to rile him up, but he pulls away.

  
He sits against the headboard and runs a hand through his hair. “We did this before. Real or not real?”

She doesn’t move from her spot. “Real.”

“And, well, you said you loved me. Real or not real?”

She hesitates. Technically, Katniss didn’t say it, but she had admitted her love.

“Why are we doing this now?”

She doesn’t have an answer for that either.

“Katniss, please answer me.”

No response.

“Then can you tell me why you ran away after?”

She opens her mouth, only to close it again.

Peeta scoffs. “That’s what I thought.” He pulls back the covers and reaches across her to turn on the lamp.

“Wha—where are you going?”

“Out,” he says, putting on his prosthetic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops.


	4. Part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peeta takes a walk and ends up at Haymitch’s house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was bored and I couldn’t find the inspiration to add anything to Come Back to Me.

It was 9:00 in evening, but that didn’t stop Haymitch from opening another bottle of liquor.

What stopped him from drinking it though, was the boy that barged into his house.

”It’s night, and you’re still drinking?”

He doesn’t answer.

“Give it to me.”

...

Two bottles later and he starts opening up.

”You know, after we ‘did the deed,” Peeta drawls. “I would have expected another round, a good morning maybe, but no. You know what she did?”

Haymitch rolls his eyes as he opens another bottle. “No. Please tell me.” Before he can take a sip, Peeta snatch’s it and drinks.

”She ducking leaves!” Even in this state, he refuses to curse. “I give her all my love, all my attention, and after the first time, I wake up to an empty bed.” He takes another swig. “That’s really rich coming from the one who said she loved me.

”I’m not gonna rush her, she doesn’t like it. So I don’t want to push her away when she takes off my clothes. But I knew what was happening. Do you know?”

Haymitch wants to shoot himself. Anything to get away from the blubbering boy.

”Gale came to town. She’s just using me as a backup. I’m always a backup. I was a mistake in the first place. I was supposed to be a girl.”

”Well you would have made a lovely girl.” He grits out.

“I know right?” Peeta exclaims. “But if I was a girl, I wouldn’t be alive. Maybe I would be alive. I sure wouldn’t have fallen in love with Katniss. Maybe I would have fallen for Gale. We would have both been fighting for Gale.”

  
”That’s it.” He grabs his arm to drag him out the door.

”Huh? Hey! Wha—“

”Go to your Sweetheart. She would have loved to hear all this.”

”But she hates me—“ The slam of the door interrupts his sentence.

Haymitch sighs as he rubs his temples before opening another bottle.

_Knock knock knock._ “Hello?”

”Go away! Nobody’s home!”

”Okie dokie. Tell Haymitch I said thank you when he gets back.”

_These kids will be the death of me._

**Author's Note:**

> If this had typos I apologize, this was just something I wrote two hours past midnight.


End file.
